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Nightstand

by Tancred

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    Includes postcard signed by Jess.

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1.
Song One 01:43
I will not lie to you, these words will be true Assistance aside, no fabrication, This is the truth Sat by the window, watching the birds go, Watching the people walk home I knew I loved her then and there I knew I loved her, touched her hair Why must we love in shackles Why must we hide in a house I sleep like a baby and wake like a man Why must she love someone else Why must she love someone else I will not lie to you, these words will be true I will not lie to you, these words will be true
2.
Make my way down the elevator And hit the street in the morning sun Gonna join the ranks of people with no sleep And last night’s makeup on Got to your place late last night And it was such a mess and I can’t forget you You are a strange one You are the queen of New York You like to have fun Make a joke and I am done for I’m done for Called a car and we got inside And it drove us past all the burning lights The city breathes like a dragon in waiting And I’m dragging my feet with its heavy sighs When we were kids we both felt it So alone and I can feel it now You are a strange one You are the queen of New York You like to have fun Make a joke and I am done for Your head is undone You are the queen of my lust In love with everyone I wanna be your next crush When we were here we both felt it Not alone but I can't feel it now
3.
Weaving a dream while you play piano Loose change and cocaine, apple tree girl With a smile you say the world is doomed If it’s true then let me hold you Kiss me like I’m a soldier Kiss me like we’ll never get older Sat in your kitchen, snow in the woods Drink my heart up, drink it up good Send me a photo of the two of us in the unknown Send me a photo of the two of us in shadow With a smile you say we’re all doomed It’s a mess but I don’t believe you I’m going home like I’m a soldier Meet me there when this is all over
4.
Hot Star 02:54
You’re a hot star, burn into me My favorite drug, I o.d. In your black coat you’re a mystery The card reader says that you’re gonna marry me You’re a hot star, fall into me A shimmer I just can’t reach Kissed you once but that’s a memory The card reader says that you’re gonna marry me If I found a key to you I’d bury it down You’re killing me and I’m ready to go You’re a hot star, tear into me Like dreamer drugs I o.d. In your black coat I’m history The gravedigger says that If I found a key to you I’d bury it down If I found a way to you I’d turn around
5.
Clipping 03:57
I lost myself in a picture of someone else Framed and lit up like a wake Felt like it was me who died that day Intuition and virtue Crash the car and just let go I’m a loser sometimes I will lose my mind sometimes Another year inside my eyes Clipping in the atmosphere I lose sometimes Hold in your hands my broken crown Show me where you have broken down Give me relief Give me relief Get it done as a tattoo Put it some place that always shows
6.
Saw you through the blue marine Pulled you in to sink down deep with me I'm in a place I should not be Are you a jewel, am I a thief With you my kingdom melts One last late night motel I tried feeling nothing And it just felt like nothing You're something else You're something else Can't help myself Something else Saw you through the fireworks Saw your eyes burn like cinders I'm in a place I should not be Can I afford your luxury With you my kingdom fell One final taste of hell I tried feeling something And it felt like summer heaven
7.
Underwear 03:23
Been beating myself up I’ve been known to throw a punch or three Well I don’t wanna fight you I’m already fighting me, and I’m losing Remember when we were in the halls at 5am In our underwear running from ghosts And in my room I learned that you were soft Like a collector you line up your toys But like a child you cry when they break She’s been pulling my strings Kissed a demon, no one swings like she swings I’ll feed the hand that bites me I can’t live without the blow I can’t live without the irony Come night an idle heart will fold And I’m losing
8.
Just You 03:18
She thinks you’re a shirt She hangs you up for weeks I have permission to rent But never can I keep And she wears you in front of the mirror And she takes you off when you don’t fit her Well come out of the woods, tell me what you see When I come up for air it all gets clearer It’s just you It’s just you I’m a kid in love with you I’m Romeo dumb and you’re Juliet blue I’m a kid, I can’t grow up ‘Cause every time we touch we both die young She thinks you’re a shirt But it’s you who’s wearing me I know my heart is hard to know But you’re the only one who does It’s just you Only you It’s just you and me And stars and blood and things It’s just you and me
9.
Your description’s what I want to see and hear You dance inside my head in another year You reach into me, pulled me from the trench I can see you smile there where the sunlight bends I’ve been a monster I’ve been a madman I’ve been a villain You’ve been a friend Remember you at fourteen Somehow older and lovely Strawberry selfish Bitter and sweet If you were older would you love me Strawberry selfish, could you love me
10.
Reviews 03:09
It takes highs and lows to celebrate you It takes all my words just to sell them the truth They don’t love me quite like they used to They don’t love me quite like they did Pay the girl, tell her give me a hairdo Paint my lips in shimmer and french blue They always tell you ‘don’t read the reviews’ So I am blind but for pictures of you When I went to your grave Snow covered half your name How could I touch something so white Take from you something so bright How could I Everything is fine It’s gonna take some time When I see lines of trees it feels like you’re with me Feels like this song don’t mean a thing It takes highs and lows to celebrate you It takes all my words to celebrate you It takes all my sight to actually see you It takes all my love to celebrate you Everything is fine It’s gonna take some time When all I can do is scream It feels like you’re listening
11.
Rowing 03:33
Haven’t been awake since I left Holland Life is but a dream so I keep rowing canals It’s deceiving how the houses are built You’d never know how much space they can fill It’s hard to end I am crude and sweet in bed I am gentle in a dress I have a beating in my breast It’s hard to end, it’s hard to end It’s hard to end, it’s hard The world is pretty when I’m up high All the ugly things look nice drifting by The world is easy when I get high I play those jukebox songs and wait to die The street musicians played in time with each other Up through the window frame where we both discover canals The scent of pastry carts hangs in the air The children throw their coins into the rivier A kiss can taste so sweet like apples and wine And disappear as quick, a girl from another time Balloons, balloons They are always rising up I am never quite enough Sinking down to earth it’s tough To get back up, to get back up To get back up, it’s tough

about

“I’m a loser sometimes / I will lose my mind sometimes,” Jess Abbott sings on “Clipping,” the shimmering, tambourine-inflected centerpiece of Tancred’s new album, Nightstand. After the themes of self-empowerment and self-possession Abbott explored on 2016’s Out of the Garden, these lines can at first seem like a bit of a worrisome relapse. And in a way, they do speak to an unexpected revelation Abbott experienced following her transformation into a more confident person.

“After I became comfortable in this new skin, in truly being myself, I was immediately hit with loneliness,” she reveals. “I realized that human connection is really important to me.” And so Abbott began a new journey of personal exploration, one that involved connecting with other people just as much as connecting with herself. “I was reading a lot of books, learning a lot of new hobbies, meeting so many new people -- just taking in as much information as possible to try and figure out what it really meant to me to be alive,” she recalls.

History is replete with such quests for the meaning of life, and with Nightstand, Abbott sought to tell her story in a way that would both connect with the past and resonate in the future. “I wanted the album to have a timeless feel to it, so you could hear my stories of love and loneliness and sense that these are themes that have existed for everyone forever,” she says.

As with her previous work, the writing process for what would become Nightstand consisted of Abbott alone in her room with just a guitar, strumming chords and singing words until gradually songs began to coalesce -- though this time around she made it a point to devote three days a week for an entire year to only playing music.

As a result, when the recording process began with Lewis Pesacov (Best Coast, Generationals) at his home studio in LA, the focus was less on finishing songs and more on perfecting them. Working with Pesacov offered new approaches – and gear – previously undiscovered by Abbott, affording her avenues of exploration that dialed in the production and tone on each and every song. “My favorite part of each day was sitting down to decide which guitar we needed to use for the song we were recording,” recalls Abbott. “It sounds so simple and I know most records are made this way, but it was my first time actually being able to do that and I loved it.”

The positive effects of this nourishing environment are evident throughout Nightstand, as on propulsive first single “Reviews,” showcasing Abbott’s strong melodic sensibilities balanced with purposeful, well-placed instrumentation. Or “Queen of New York,” which captures the feelings of fleeting lust set against a metropolitan backdrop, all within an effervescent three-minute bop.

Of course, it wouldn’t truly be a Tancred album if the upbeat melodies didn’t also serve to sugarcoat Abbott’s often somber lyrics about the experience of being a woman and being queer in today’s society. But even she is quick to emphasize that there is still comfort to be found during times of isolation or alienation: “Ultimately, we are all feeling these things together, and that can be enough to feel less alone. There’s a hopefulness in the loneliness.”

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released June 1, 2018

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